Ice Cream Social

Here’s how to live your best life right now (on campus):

 

Go confidently in the direction of Fresh Food Company
Don’t feel like wasting a meal plan to meet your squad at Fresh? Just walk past the cashiers very confidently and take a seat. A head held high and loud shoes will enhance the impression of importance. One of my friends did it once, and it totally worked.

Make your family love you
Heading home for the weekend but don’t want to waste all your meal plans? Spend them on Subway cookies. Your family will forget that you came home with three weeks of laundry if you come bearing tasty treats.

Don’t eat pasta with your hands
Nothing is as sad as realizing you’ve made Easy Mac and lack the utensils to enjoy it. To avoid such a tragedy, borrow napkins and utensils generously from the campus food courts to keep your supplies stocked. I’m sure your tuition must cover those costs somewhere.

Get thrifty with your expensive coffee habit
If you’ve been wasting those Meal Plan Dollars on a bagel that makes your morning classes a little more bearable, take another look at your receipt before pitching it in the garbage. By taking a quick survey, you get free regular coffee with any purchase. That purchase can be a $1 bagel.

Keep yourself from sweating (and swearing because you’re late)
Tired of the body confusion that results from sweating your way up the Hill in freezing temperatures? Take a day off and ride the Grise elevator to the fourth floor and exit toward the fine arts center. Get there early to avoid the busier crunch time between classes.

Spend more time in the shower and less time in the lab
Here’s a common scenario: you worked into the wee hours on a project, slept through your alarms, and ran to class frantic because you needed to turn in the fruits of your labor. Save yourself a step or two by uploading your paper through webprint.wku.edu, where a document from your own computer can be printed in any of the campus labs. Avoid logging into lab computers, head straight for the printer with your ID, and roll into class with time to spare. And also, you should, like, probably shower at some point.

Ask for a bowl at Fresh Food Company for “soup”
If you don’t have the time to sit and eat at Fresh but still want to enjoy the full experience, ask for a soup bowl with your takeout supplies. There’s no reason that “soup” bowl can’t also contain a healthy serving of ice cream or Lucky Charms.

Talk to your professors (but not too much)
In case you weren’t aware, your professors are actual humans who have actual office hours during which they might actually be willing to speak to you. Be bold! Give your professors a visit, but also recognize when you’ve overstayed your welcome. When your professor knows your eating and bathing habits better than your roommate, it’s time for you to go.

Stop failing your classes
Are you on the struggle bus? There are seriously so many people being paid to provide free tutoring to students on campus. Visit The Learning Center for tutoring in a variety of subjects or departmental centers that offer more specific services. Don’t be afraid to ask your professors where you can find extra help.

Talk about it
Sometimes you need someone to talk to other than your friends. Luckily, WKU has a group of professionals to help with exactly that. The WKU Counseling & Testing Center offers on-campus counseling services to students for a one-time $20 fee. For more information, you can also call 270-745-3159 or visit their website.

Don’t refinance your dorm room to pay for textbooks
No offense to the great folks in DSU, but let’s be honest—literally every other book-buying option is cheaper (blame textbook publishers, not our friends at the WKU Store). Research your textbooks before the semester begins (you can use the Verba Compare tool through the bookstore) and check prices through discount sites like AbeBooks, Amazon, Chegg, and Half Price Books. Your wallet (and probably your parents) will thank you.

Stop using Notepad as a Word processor
A list of reasons why Notepad is terrible: there’s no formatting, it’s hideous, and it’s incredibly frustrating. Fortunately for your professors, you can no longer use the excuse that Microsoft Office is too expensive: you can use your WKU student email address to download Office for free. Just search “free Microsoft Office” through the WKU homepage and start Word processing like a real adult.

 

You’ve got this, Toppers!