How to have the best spring break ever — in your dorm

Here’s the rub. You’re technically not supposed to be in your dorm over spring break. But let’s just say that somehow you end up staying on campus. We won’t tell if you won’t.

Here’s a list of all the fun activities you can do once you become the master of your domain — without ever leaving the dorm.

Think of it as our Emily Dickinson-inspired guide to spring break.


Count the bricks in the wall.

You should know what’s supporting you, right?

Be bold. Go nude.

No one else is here.

It’s time.

Work on your poetry.

Now that you don’t have social obligations or classes to attend, you have so much time to generate poetry.

A solid 1,800 poems is a great goal to shoot for. Only a few will probably get published in your lifetime, but someone will find them one day and make you ~famous~.

See what happens when you keep the elevator doors open — forever.

Your roommate isn’t around to distract you anymore, but sometimes you need a separate space to find your peace. Try pulling your standard issue desk and chair into the elevator and blocking the doors so it never moves.

Voila! It’s your very own workspace.

And a fire hazard.

It’s not a bathroom, it’s your room.

Instead of waiting in line while people take their sweet time in the mornings, the showers are all yours now. It’s your chance to go crazy.

Ditch your shower flip-flops. You’re the only one using the stalls these days, so you don’t have to worry about getting athlete’s foot from that person in your hall that doesn’t shower after going to Preston.

You can also take a mega shower. Find a way to jerry-rig the shower heads to point outwards, and let the water fly. You can get clean from every angle, and it might kind of make the bathroom cleaner.

If you’re feeling high seas-level adventurous, flood the bathroom and use a mattress (definitely your roommate’s) as a boat.

You’re the captain now.

Become nocturnal.

Not having classes means it’s the perfect time to do some probably irreversible damage to your sleep cycle.

You’ll want to start this early. Try and rise at 6 a.m. on Monday morning, and then promptly go right back to sleep.

When you rise from your slumber, the whole night is yours. This is the perfect time to watch all of Full House and Fuller House. Start with the last episode of Fuller House, and then work your way backwards to the pilot of Full House to really mess with your mind.

How did D.J. get so small? Did Kimmy Gibbler somehow get more annoying? Who are these young twins that show up? Where is the mom?

Nothing is real anymore.

Yodel in the stairwells.

Something about the spring air makes yodeling just feel right. And the stairwell is the perfect place to get that echo down pat.

Now’s your time to show off your pipes.

Go on, give us a few notes.

Sleep in your roommate’s bed.

Harper Lee wrote in To Kill a Mockingbird that we can never really understand people until we climb inside their skin and walk around.

Now that your roommate is gone for a week, it’s the perfect time to climb into their bed.

This may seem kind of gross, but how can you know what it’s like to be your roommate until you’ve slept a night in their sheets?

Empathy is important, and this can be the first step.

Explore the ceilings.

Once again, it’s time.

No one’s around to judge you for crawling up into the ceiling tiles like a weird, acrobatic rat.

What’s up there?

Let us know what you find, and we’ll probably feature you on our website.


Have a great spring break, Toppers!

And seriously, let us know what’s going on in the ceilings.